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Dear JH Simon. Thankyou and thankyou again! Your work and your words clarify this unholy union between the narcissist and their lover. Its a sad story but it needs to be told.

I have been a narcissist magnet all my adiult life. In fact I just don't seem to be all that attracted to "nice men." All my significant relationships have been of this ilk to one degree or another. While the internet is chalk full of videos on the topic walking away is not enough.

After the "honeymoon" phase of my last relationship which lasted aprox 2 years give or take the off again/on again pattern-- I finally --finally began to understand that the connection between us was a throwback to my childhood. I knew his childhood was bad, as was mine, but he never shared the details. As I got to know him more and observe more I started to see the enormous path of destruction he had left behind him. We are both in our 60's so that is a lot of years of trouble. He discarded me about a year ago--just disappeared-not even a text---there was probably another woman. In spite of the abuse I had tolerated I was devastated. I am slowly recovering. I realize now --much thanks to you how "unhealed trauma" is the root of all of this. Now I need to figure out how to begin healing that trauma. There is a saying that when the student is ready the teacher will appear. Kari

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Thanks for your feedback and support, Kari. My article on the sado-masochism of narcissism might be of interest to you, based on what you shared. I can only imagine how difficult the discard is to cope with. Feel free to reach out if you have any particular topics you'd like me to explore in future pieces. Thanks again.

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This was an informative, interesting and entertaining article. Thank you!

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