The Narcissistic Trinity

In The Name Of The Narcissist, The Narcissist And The Holy Narcissist

A narcissist is a one-person religion. They gallivant through the world, looking to ‘convert’ targets into believers. By offering the promise of transcendence, they aim to replace God in the consciousness of their victims.

To help illustrate this process, let’s break down the narcissist’s ‘godliness’ in the same manner as the Christian Holy Trinity (The Father, The Son And The Holy Spirit):

1. The False Self (The Father)

The grandiose false self is the narcissist’s larger-than-life persona. The narcissist might act aloof and self-important, appearing stoic and vengeful like the Old Testament God, or they could be more ‘parental’ and unconditional in their love like the New Testament God.

Although it is a construct of the mind, the false self emits an immortal vibe. There is a conviction in the narcissist which is unaffected by external challenges. This creates a duality between you and the narcissist, forcing you to take the opposing ‘mortal’ position.

The Old Testament narcissist, through their authoritative appearance, demands that you submit to them like a cowering child. The New Testament narcissist, on the other hand, emulates the ideal parental love, inviting you into their influence like a child melting into a parent’s embrace.

2. The Wounded Child (The Son)

When the narcissist’s grandiose projection falters, or their target begins to question them, defy them and grow distant from them, the narcissist sinks to the level of their wounded child.

To emulate Christ, the narcissist appeals to your empathy and guilt by casting themselves as someone being persecuted on a cross. Through accusations, judgements, reactive abuse and guilt-tripping, the narcissist casts you as that persecutor.

Gone are the narcissist’s arrogance, haughtiness and bulletproof confidence. Their all-loving, all-accepting divinity feels like a distant memory. The narcissist bares themselves fully to you in their rawest emotional state, declaring themselves psychologically ‘bloodied’ by ‘your actions’.

How could you be angry at them? How could you mistreat them like this? Look how authentic and vulnerable they seem now. Their resurrection and ascendance will happen at any moment, transforming them into the person you always hoped they could be. Their redemption feels so close — if only you would stop being so ‘unreasonable’ and go back to the way things were.

3. And The Fantasy (The Holy Spirit)

The fantasy world of the narcissist is akin to the Holy Spirit. It permeates the entire relationship, imbuing it with meaning and purpose.

The narcissist’s ‘spirit’ acts through you via their compliments, flattery, undivided attention and seductive flirting. Their world is a warm cocoon, a sanctuary for only you and them. They invite you to throw caution to the wind and transcend reality by denying it altogether. The narcissist appeals to your imagination, painting vivid pictures of the perfect love, the greatest successes and the most exhilarating adventures.

Combined, the narcissistic trinity offers you a religious experience, allowing you to leave everything behind; your world, your failures, your trauma and your broken dreams. This transcendence carries you deeper and deeper into the narcissist’s ‘divine’ realm, before the cracks inevitably appear, revealing the narcissist’s religion to be a broken promise — a howling emptiness around which their cult of personality had you fooled all along.

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Browse more articles:

Narcissistic Relationships | Knowing The Narcissist | Abuse Recovery | The Narcissistic Family| Exploring Narcissism | Borderline & Histrionic

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